Combat Command Files
Mood:  celebratory

My 25th Anniversary dossiers are done!

https://theredshark.tripod.com/files.html

 

 

G.I. Joe 25th Anniversary figures - Wave 1
Mood:  down

My enthusiasm for the 25^th Anniversary figures has been tempered by the release of pictures of Wave 1.  Whereas the five packs were just amazing, these figures are not up to par.  That's not to say that the five pack figures were perfect, but they were pretty close.  Besides Storm Shadow's sandals, the choice of rifle for Duke, and the possibility of Cobra Commander and Destro have closed fists on their left hand, there wasn't much wrong with them.  That is saying a lot for ten figures.

But with Wave 1, there are lots of problems.  It is almost like Hasbro said, "How can we make fifteen figures from ten molds," because the reuse of parts is blatant.  Now, I can excuse the reuse of parts when they are not obvious and make sense.  But some of these choices fall short.  Here is a breakdown figure by figure.

Hooded Cobra Commander - I started with the best of the bunch.  Other than the cartoon inspired gloves (which I like anyway), this figure is a perfect homage to the original mail-in Hooded CC.  While I would have preferred one CC figure with interchangeable hood and helmet, this is still a nice looking figure, and what I expected.  http://i.toynewsi.com/g/index.php?mode=view&album=GIJoe%2F25th&pic=63456_GI_Joe_25th_Anniv_Cob.jpg.  Originial figure: http://www.yojoe.com/action/84/cobracommander2.shtml

Storm Shadow - Egad, this figure fails.  Perhaps the biggest problem is that it seems an easy situation to correct - give him Duke's arms instead of the ones he has, paint the leggings white instead of gray, loose the waist piece, and of course get rid of those awful sandals.  The weapons don't bother me too much, since SSv2's weapons weren't the greatest (a red sword... wtf?).  However, I do wish he came with a claw.  Maybe Marauder, Inc. can make something cool to fill the void.  http://i.toynewsi.com/g/index.php?mode=view&album=GIJoe%2F25th&pic=63453_GI_Joe_25th_Anniv_Sto.jpg.  Original figure: http://www.yojoe.com/action/88/stormshadow2.shtml

Snake Eyes - If you look at this figure from the waist up, he matches SEv2 pretty well.  But, from the waist down is a different story.  While I always thought that SEv2's "ankle bracelets" were a bit strange looking, that is the iconic look.  In fact, many would argue that SEv2 is the most iconic figure of the entire RAH line.  I'm trying to like this "update," but the gray boots just don't work or me.  Maybe with they were reversed, black with gray highlights, I'd like them better.  http://i.toynewsi.com/g/index.php?mode=view&album=GIJoe%2F25th&pic=63454_GI_Joe_25th_Anniv_Sna.jpg.  Original figure: http://www.yojoe.com/action/85/snakeeyes2.shtml

Cobra Officer - There are two things I really don't like about this figure.  The gray face mask/knee pads and the choice of weapon.  Now of course I'd prefer that he didn't have knee pads at all to more closely match the original Cobra Officer, but if you had to have them, keep them black.  Speaking of keeping things black, I abhor the gray face mask.  Now my problem with the weapon isn't that it is silver (although black would be better), the problem is that it is a sniper rifle and not an AK-47!  It should be an AK-47!    This could have been a great update to the Cobra Officer...close, but no cigar.  http://i.toynewsi.com/g/index.php?mode=view&album=GIJoe%2F25th&pic=63455_GI_Joe_25th_Anniv_Cob.jpg.  Original figure: http://www.yojoe.com/action/83/cobraofficer1p5.shtml

Flint - When I heard this figured used Duke's body I was steamed!  Now that I've seen it though, my only beef is the sleeves.  They are a big beef though!  I would think that Hasbro would eventually need short sleeve arms for other characters, so why not make then now for Flint.  I just don't get it.  Other than the sleeves, this is a case where reusing parts worked.  Give him different arms and Flint would be just about perfect.  http://i.toynewsi.com/g/index.php?mode=view&album=GIJoe%2F25th&pic=63459_GI_Joe_25th_Anniv_Fli.jpg.  Original figure: http://www.yojoe.com/action/85/flint.shtml

I've read the Waves 2 and 3 will not have nearly as many reused parts, and I hope that is true.  Especially considering that Wave 2 will likely consist of Beach Head, Buzzer, Lady Jaye, Serpentor, and Cobra Trooper (okay, this last one will be reused parts because it will be the same figure as in the five pack.  I do hope they chance the figure's hair color but NOT anything with the uniform).  We shall see... 

Transforming our world, eh?
Mood:  quizzical

So Hidden Valley Ranch Dressing causes hallucinations?  I mean, I watch these commercials, and all these college kids eat a salad and then believe they are back at home with their families.  If that had been me in college, I would have hallucinated about having an orgy with the Tri Sig Sorority.  But that is me.  Good for these kids.  Anyway, I can't stand the taste of Ranch Dressing so I'm safe for any chemical induced states...

Anyway, the more I hear about the Transformers: The Movie, the more my Fanboyness gets out of sorts.  It is bad enough that Bumblebee is not a Volkswagon Beetle, but now I hear that he doesn't speak?  Megatron is a alien jet?  Optimus Prime is red and blue but not in the correct places?  Blasphemy!

I know, I should reserve judgement until I see it, or something.  After all, the film could be really good.  And changing certain things might not be bad, right?  I mean, I learned to accept organic web shooters in the Spider-Man movies.  Forget the fact that Spidey had mecahnical web shooters for over 30 years.  They went organic, and it really didn't bother me.  Except now, as I type this.  Stupid organic web shooters!

Some would say that fanboys have no right to whine, whine, whine, but I disagree.  I have spend a large amount of money on Hasbro's products (moreso G.I. Joe than Transformers) and therefore I think I have the right to complain.  I've earned it through the tremedous consumer support of purchasing every action figure I could for near the last 30 years.

Of course, when the same fanboy who complains then goes to see the movie (3 times.  In one day.) and buys all the action figures, and they buys it on DVD, well, that certainly doesn't sounds like someone who is peeved off.  But I hold strong!  I refuse to buy Superman Returns on DVD and haven't purchased any merchandise (although if I can get a figure on clearance I will only to stand him next to my Batman Begins figure).

This weekend me and some buddies are going to watch the 20th Anniversary DVD of Transformers: The (animated) Movie.  I'm stoked.  I'm sure we'll reminisce about all the good times we had playing with our toys and watching the old cartoon.  We may even make plans to go see the new movie in July.  Alas, we'll probably leave the theater disappointed.

This is why I hope a GI Joe live action move is never made (especially not one with that awful script revealed at latinoreview.com).  It will just get screwed up, and my poor childhood will just get ass raped again.  Lucas ass raped it with those new "Star War" inspired films (I refuse to aknowlege that they are actual prequels).   Superman Returns pounded my childhood from behind but good.  Now these filmakers are apparently ass raping it again.  Go ahead childhood, bend over and let them get it over quick...

Alison Morris
Mood:  amorous

The only reason I watch the news: http://kdka.com/bios/local_bio_252151435.html

 

 

Boycott the new Bond!
Mood:  mischievious

Join the boycott of Casino Royale!

http://danielcraigisnotbond.com/

 

 

 

Spider-Friends? Go for it!
Mood:  on fire

Whenever I hear about how Spider-Man 3 is currently being filmed, or how they are considering a spin-off from X-Men, I can't help but think this this is the film I'd like to see... https://theredshark.tripod.com/spiderfriends.html

 On second thought, I vote for Isla Fisher as Firestar: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0279545/

 

 

Bunch o things
Mood:  irritated

I'm now retyping this blog because Tripod deleted it the first time!

 

Anyway, it has been awhile since I've posted, so this blog will cover several topics.

1. Who Wants to be a Superhero? - I have emensly enjoyed this show, which is saying something considering my disdain for "reality tv."  I was disappointed when Major Victory was elimenated last week, since I really thought it would come down to him and Feedback.  I just don't see Fat Mama winning, nice as she is.  I guess we'll find out tonight!

2. Blade: The Series - Last night's episode wasn't too bad.  There have been some decent ones, and some I've barely been able to get through.  It may have potential yet...

3. ECW - On the other hand, I've given up on ECW.  I haven't watched in the last two weeks and I haven't missed it. 

4. Superman Returns - Superman is dead.  At least the Superman I grew up wth is.  This movie is an abomination.  Maybe if I can work up enough energy I'll do a thorough review.

5. Transformers: The Movie - Bumblebee is going to be a Mustang and not a Volkswagon Beetle?  WTF!?

6. Smallville - Even though this is also a raping of the Superman legend, I don't hate it like I hated SR.  I still tune into this show to see what aspect of the character they'll ruin next.  Plus, it is on before Supernatural.

7. Heroes - Looks like it might be interesting.  I'll have to tune in.

8. Shark Week 2006 - Rocked as always.  Next year is #20!

 

Shark Week
Mood:  happy

Next week is SHARK WEEK!

http://dsc.discovery.com/convergence/sharkweek/sharkweek.html?dcitc=w01-104-ae-0010

 

 

 

ECW! ECW! ECW?
Mood:  incredulous
Jerry "The King" Lawler is right, it is "Extremely Crappy Wrestling." ECW started off with a fair show, nothing great, but not bad either. It has not gotten better. I'm already sick of Mike Knox's bit with Kelly. Kelly is hot, but she has no idea how to do a sexy dance. The Zombie was funny (I loved his promo) and Macho Libre wasn't bad, but now the Sandman's "caning segment" has gotten stale as well.

This is not the ECW I remember, it is the WWE's version of ECW. Fine, then call it WWE Extreme, like WWE Raw and WWE Smackdown. But don't try to convince me this is ECW. It ain't. If I want WWE product I'll watch Raw or even Smackdown. I want ECW. I miss ECW.

Poor RVD was on top of the world until he was stupid enough to get caught with Mary Jane. Dumbass. Now the belt is on Big Show. Huh? Well, after RVD and Kurt Angle, he is the most believable as champ. (There was a reason guys like Sandman and Sabu weren't in WWE). Too bad Angle is taking time off, it would have been great for him to win the title. Where to they go from here? I don't know.

ECW is quickly turning into a giant clusterfrick, and quite frankly I think its days are numbered. There was a time when that would have disappointed me. Now I say, "Pull the plug and let it die."

Danish or Danishes?
Mood:  silly
Well, I was going to write my thoughts on the Big Ben accident. Sarcastically I was going to say how we should ignore the fact that he was riding without a helmet OR a license and should instead focus on running the other driver out of town. (Ironic that the lady from Maine was making a "Pittsburgh left," eh?). But I'm sure everyone is sick of hearing about that too, so let me just say that I hope Ben gets well soon.

Then I thought I could write about how, after a promising Pay Per View on Sunday, ECW on Sci-Fi was lousy. But hey, it was the first show, so I'll just hope it gets better.

No, instead I am going to write about my favorite breakfast food - the Danish!

I love Danishes - or is the plural Danish? Someone told me that once. I looked it up though, and it appears that either is acceptable. Let's look at my favorite flavors:

Cherry - I could live on a diet of cherry Danishes, 'nuff said.

Pineapple - My second favorite, I usually order one cherry and one of these.

Blueberry - If I can't get cherry or pineapple, blueberry is a worthy substitute.

Apricot - There is a reason this is #4, but I'll eat it, cause I loves me some Danish!

Apple and cheese need not apply! Cheese Danishes are disgusting. Yuck! And I rarely care for apple anything - including apple pie. I don't much care for baseball either, although I do love my mom. One out of three, hmmm, does that make me unAmerican? I think it should be changed to Mom, Football, and Cherry Pie! Booya!

I got two Danishes for breakfast this morning. They came from Jenny Lee and were quite yummy. The best Danishes ever came from Karn's Bakery on Steubenville Pike in Robinson Township. The went out of business and the building is now a pizza place. When I was a youngster I worked at the Dairy Queen next door to the bakery (the DQ is now a Truck N Stuff). When my buddy Elwood and I worked the day shift we'd go in early and meet for breakfast at the bakery. I'd always get Danish. Ah, what a simpler time.

Did you ever notice that bakeries tend to employ young hot girls? Karns did it, and the last three times I went to Jenny Lee I was waited on my jailbait. What up wit dat?

But I digress. Back to Danishes. They are on my list of favorite foods. Also making the cut are bacon, shrimp cocktail, and stuffed porkchops. I've recently really become fond of stuffed peppers too. Well, now I'm just rambling. Peace out!